UnT_15

looks like i found it time by time..day by day :)

 the reason why i must do that thing.

it's a simple answer, a VERY simple answer maybe,

but VERY hard also to try and accomplish.

the problem's grow bigger and bigger everytime i think about it..

and they're being more annoying than i tought day by day..

from the heart that feels so much,

then the eyes have seen so many,

and mind that think a lot.

i found one more to understand.

.............................

as an ego, i want him to be with me, but he's NOT a thing

as an ego, i'm angry for no reason if someone's too close to him..

it's hurts me...it's LIKE hurts me.
but then just about 'he's not a thing'
he's someone.

people called it love?

is it?

i don't think so.

am i feel comfortable besides him? yes.

is he teach me so many about life? ya.

did he make you feels better when you're sad? yes.

and also make me cry.

and he was...a man? a boy? a kid?

i don't know.

.............................

the feeling is no different like the people always told me about love somebody.

i missed him in the night...in the silence, in mind...
his name's resounds in my head..

can't wait to meet him on the next day..
all things he did changed my mood over a day.

when he's sad, I'm sad.

when he's happy, i feel the same.

I spent my time without regret with him.

even 'though I sacrificed a lot.

Sometimes I asked my feeling,

"Why do you feel like this,

when even you're really-really NOT in love?"

It's strange.

It's just a comfort. Yes it's comfortable.

But just a freedom of each other.

No. I'm not in love with him,

even for a second, I never think of it.

Do you ever feel this kind of feelings?

.........................

maybe i just want the best for him..

is it a funny things that almost all people say and know?

but really. i wish he get the best  :)

..................................

People's life teach me a lot of things.

Not by what they said --whiches I rarely heard them--

but I see their LIVES.

and consider one thing these days.

The answer of why I must let this go.

The answer why I'm not fall in love with him,

but also can't let him away.

And I think it's because....

I will never can take care of him.

I can't make him happy.

and looks like I never can do it until today

..........................

 Sometimes love is not enough, right?

You need to learn something.

You need to change yourself. Be a better one.

And you need to understand.

Then for this one, I can't even give him anything.
What have I give during that time?

I can't make him happy.

I'm not the one who make him feels better in despair.

What I have done for him...is nothing

.............................

I can't and don't bring a happiness for him.

Even..I never done anything for him

and maybe that's the reason why I'm not fall in love with him.

He gives me so much,

His times. His understands.

His minds and talks. But me?

I don't give anything.

.................

So looks like all will gets better if we're not together

No one will hurt.

No one missed each other.

No one will cry.

No more tears and hatred.

Everythings will be fine

............................................

I'm sorry for doing nothing for you